Chinese New Year

Chinese New Year,

This coming year will be the year of the Ox,
that seriously is the last thing in my mind when I think of
this period though. Chinese new year for me is about meeting
my cousins and relatives. The part of my family I only see
once or twice in a year (unless something like a wedding happens).

I have a tough time communicating with quite a few of them,
but even with the lack of communication I feel very accepted
when I go back for chinese new year. I don't speak neither
Mandarin nor Hokkien and some of my relatives can't speak
english. When they are in a group talking I try to comprehend
what they say since I do understand a little bit of hokkein and
mandarin but my efforts always end up futile half way through
the convo haha (too many unknown words).

Nevertheless they are such warm people, I do feel the love when
I'm with them which makes me never ever want to miss my
chinese new year reunion dinner ^^. I also get to eat every two
hours...haha yeah it's cool like that!! The sweetest part of the deal
has to definately be the "Ang Pow", who else gives you money in
a small red packets without expecting anything back? :P

It's the time when family is more important then anything else,
and it's the time when we meet new family members. Cousins who
bring thier bf/gf to the chinese new year reunion usually end up
married a few years down the road. It's kind of a platform to
introduce your choice to the family. Hahaha, my aunties are already
asking me where is my girlfriends....grrrr. I'm not ready to get
married yet hahaha. It's also amazing to see how fast the neices
and nephews grow when you see them only onces a year.

I can't wait to go to the family reunion this year. This year it's in my
uncles house all the way in Johor Bharu and my dad says we might
not make the trip there....argh....come on man...it's just once a year.
I'll somehow try to make it there despite my dad's decision though.

Mandarin orenges, dried pork slices, and a massive dinner and metting
loved ones....why would i ever miss that :D

enjoy people ^_^ Happy chinese new year
peace out

As It Unfolds (Part 3)

Sometimes problems in a relationship is not because
of you or your partner but because it's fate. This time my
gf told me that the doctor suspects that her leukemia was
re-emerging (not too sure about the time, my memory is
failing me =.="). At that point my gf and I were sitting in
a ingame town talking and making up after testing times
or at leastI was trying to.

She had other things in mind which were far more serious.
She might need to go get admitted for medication to her
leukemia. After things were more certain later she told
me about what she had to and told me that it may take
months. I wasn't even close to thinking about how i'll be
when i'm separate with her. All i wanted is for my girl to
come back out of this test healthy as she was before. I told
her i'd wait for her recovery no matter how long it took.

When she left for her treatment, I didn't spend a day
without praying. I'm not much of a praying guy though,
this made my mom curious. By now i've already told my
mom about this wonderful girl I met online and mom was
happy for me because she could see the difference my gf
has made in my life. A few weeks into it, i finally broke
it to my mom that my gf was in the hospital and stuff.
She told me that I have to be strong for her and pray for
her recovery, not like i wans't doing it already. I even
made a vow to dedicate my walk with the anual thaipusam
chariot to the recovery of my gf and vowed to bald myself
as a homage to god for what he was to do for me.

Hours became days, days became weeks and weeks became
months. There was no one day that I didn't think about my
love who was suffering in the hospital. I missed her sooo
much, at that moment i just knew life without her would be
a life with no meaning for me. True that i have everyone
else, parents, sister, friends ,cousins and all but no
one as special as the person who's in the hospital now
wishing I was waiting for her. She made my day brighter
and my nights more peaceful, she motivated me in more ways
then one.

This was a really sad and testing time for me, I was bored
after spending hours talking to her before. The game we
were playing didn't seem as fun as when she was there. I
tried to find alternate souces to keep myself busy and
entertained. Such as chatting online, messing with my
facebook account and playing football every evening. I sent
her loads of emails as i told her i would, so that she can
read once she have the chance. Everyday i'd open my email
hoping to see "My Love" on the sender column. Everytime
I see a new mail coming in, i get exited and hopeful.

Finally after about 1 months or 2 months of waiting I get
a message from her. I wish I had kept those messages safe
for me to recall what it said. Nevertheless it was one of
the best moments in my life, i felt so releaved that it was
like someone gave me back my life :) I love my gf so much
I just can't think of any other girl in her place. Waiting
for a loved one to contact you after having such a sickness
was like nothing i've ever felt in life. I was so thankful
to god or whatever force that helped my gf and I through it.

That's it for this stage of my relationship....more to come
next time.

As it Unfolds (Part 2)

As every relationship goes further, problems are inevitable and
this relationship was no different. The first time I got agitated
was when a so called friend J met my girlfriend after I got her
into the same guild as me. He started getting really close to my
gf when i wasn't around. At first i didn't think much of it, trust is
a key component of love, without trust there is only bound to be
misery.

As J started getting closer to my gf, i realized something was
really wrong, he wasn't acting like a normal friend at all. At this
moment i confronted my gf and told her that J is thinking of
something more then just friendship and she have to be aware
of it. My gf thought i got him misunderstood, so i confronted
J myself. He tells me, he likes my gf and he says sorry....

I was like WTF man..... I was so pissed at him and i don't know
if what i said after that was right. I told him, i trust my gf and
let the best man win. I told him you can try as much as you want
but i trust my gf and nothing is gonna take her away from me.
This triggered him to venture into his ambitions with more
freedom. I wish i hadn't said that to him, it's not because i was
scared my gf might leave me but to save my gf from unnecessary
problems.

As things got more serious, J said things he shouldn't have and
manipulated words i said and reported it to my gf. Problems
started between me and my gf. Such cheap skate tricks with
no dignity what so ever. From that point on, I was so angry with
J i'd have broken his face if i ever met him in real. Meanwhile,
my gf was having problems that i wasn't aware off.

She was developing a long dormant sickness she was carrying
which might have been something i caused also. She has had
leukemia when she was younger and the cancer was beginning
manifest again without us realizing. She staying awake for me
on odd hours because of our massive time difference may
have caused it to reappear.

By this time J's tricks were uncovered by me and put forth to
my gf with some proof. My girlfriends finally saw how J was.
Less then a fortnight after he was sidelined by my gf he was
after another girl >.<" So much for "i really love her i had to
take a chance although she's your gf". Now when i think of him
I just get disgusted.

Finally the first hurdle of out relationship was over and done with.
But not long after the second one will arise...

As it Unfolds (Part 1)

I don't think many people reads this blog, but I think i'm
finally going to post something quite personal to me.

About 2+ years ago I just shifted to my new house in Klang.
After screwing up my studies in MMU because of too much
gaming, I started working for my dad. This didn't last though,
my dad and I just couldn't work together, petty quarrels
every time.

Since it was not working out, I seriously thought of giving
my brains another chance of proving itself. I know i'm not
stupid and the people around me also know I'm not stupid
but my indulgence in certain things go out of control, like
games. At that moment I told myself i'm going to quit online
gaming after 1 last spell on it.

I looked for the best RO server i could find and started playing.
I got pretty strong and all and joined a good guild and made
some great friends. Above all, one person stood out, one person
who would change me for life. It's funny how it all started, I saw
this little avatar girl standing in a cross junction with an in game
nick name "Kana". I couldn't help but to message her and say
"hey your nick is my real name"... that's when it all started. We
talked a lot after that, just as friends.

As time passed, i knew her more and more and i felt this magnetic
attraction towards her. So, what the hell I started making a move
on her not knowing what i'm getting into. Thing turn out superb
though, she was a dream come true. We got ever so close and i
care and love her as if she was my wife. Everything was going so
fine, i made all kinds of plans with her. She was in Canada, I was in
Malaysia. Just her being there for me motivated me, I made sure i
did well in my exams. She is a brilliant girl, who gives her all into
studies.

I was so in love, there is no words to describe.......