The Supernatural (Part 1)

The meaning of supernatural is a power that seems to defy
or go beyond thenatural forces as we know it. This topic has
captivated me for a long long time. I have to say i have
experienced super natural things, I can't explain these things.
Well if i have enough space in this entry i will share a some
of my experiences. Before I start, supernatural is not only
ghosts and demons and stuff. Here a list of things I think goes
under supernatural, things human science can't answer:

- God
- Life (Soul)
- Ghosts
- Angels / Demons
- Aliens
- Phycics and Predictions
- Dimensions

These are the things I can think of now, but I’m sure there are
more. May be all these things are linked together in a science
not yet known to man or just the science we have now is not
even right. This would explain why these things are not
considered natural.



First off, God. One of the most controversial topic in the
history of mankind. his topic is only controversial because
mankind added something called religion into it. Regardless
of which religion there is no doubt that there is a force which
we deem the creator. So, who is this god? Who is our creator?
It’s strange then I think about it, if we’re created by god, who
created god? Well I have a theory about this though. I think
god is no other then an energy source, god has no life(It’s
immortal/ Inexhaustible energy), has no thought but has a way
to balance out equilibrium of the universe. If something goes
to the extreme in one end of the universe, this energy source
will correct it by sending the same about of extreme force to
balance it. We’re all created in the image of the energy like
what the bible says because in every one of us there is an
inexhaustible power source, which is life/soul. Before you go
bashing in my ideas, I’m not asking you to believe what I say
or accept my theories. This is just my speculation.

So now the discussion leads us to Life/Soul. I think the soul
that is somehow transmitted to us when we’re new embryo’s,
a tiny little piece of energy from the creator force. This energy
might be from this world (Earth), or it may be from space, or
from previous souls that had to leave their body due to death.
For some reason we all feel there is more then just our body
in us, don’t we? It feels like you’re more than the physical
presence you have. If this is not true, why do we have burial
ceremonies for millennia’s? This thing we feel, I think is the
soul or our life force that will not extinguish at the end of our
physical presence. So what happens to us when we die, you
may ask. Well some of us may go back to rejoin the great force,
some of us may linger on to find another host, some of us may
still have unfinished business (ghosts) and some of us may be
enslaved by a bigger force of energy that does not allow us to
pass.

Now comes the topic of ghosts. Life as human is a competitive
one, so much so we all have to take care of ourselves, our family
and our loved ones. Some of us adopt great desires, may be an
ambition or great love towards another soul. These feelings make
our soul become unstable until we attain our goals. What happens
when we lose our host body due to death before we can attain our
goals? Our souls remain unstable and in an unstable condition we
are not able to move on. Most of the time the feeling we carry isn’t
enough to destabilize oursoul, but some people can really be
obsessive towards some things and their souls are left behind.
Some of you may say, this is all a big piece of bullshit, there is no
such things as ghosts. Well believe what you want to, I’ve had my
share of experiences to believe otherwise. People who know me
may have heard of my experiences, but I don't feeling like going
into details about them at the moment, There are also souls who
are trapped not because their unstable, but because a stronger force
is holding them back. These are the things I call demons, and the
next part i'll cover on this faul energies and their rivals, the angels.

This post kinda got out of hand and became way too lon for one
post. So, I guess i'll keep the rest for another installment of "The
Supernatural". I hope you had a nice read, not aksing you to belive
them, these are jsut my thoughts and theories.
Peace out till next time guys.

Information Technology

First off, I'm sorry it took such a long time to post this installment
of the blog. I was busy with other things but now i'm back ^^

Although i'm studying IT and seem so into these things, this was
not what i had planned for my life in the younger days. I wanted
to be an aeronautical engineer, but life had other plans for me :)
Aeronautical engineering fell off the pages because of circumstances.
May be i'll get into that part some other time, now I'll concentrate
on IT.

The fascination of computers started for me with computer games.
I used to be one of those young boys who'd exchange games CDs
with friends and go crazy on it. Go to school the next day and brag
about what we have accomplished.

In the early 1990s computers had a few problems but the one
that effected young gamers the most is the lack of hard disk space.
We can only play one game(good strategy game) at a time because
the computer would only have space for one installation at a time.
So, what happens when you want to play another game? We'll
have to uninstall the older game and install the new one. This
process screws with the windows and it causes a lot of problems.

Due to this I had to learn how to fix problems with the computers.
Mostly, what I'd do is format the computer and reinstall the windows.
Later we found out this was also not good for the hard disk, so we
found out other ways to fix these computers. As time passed, we
were pretty decent with troubleshooting computer problems.

So, when my aeronautical engineering plans failed, I picked to do
something I was familiar with, which I thought was the safest path
to take. What I didn't know was, IT isn't repairing computers >.<
The cause I took was more about creating the software in the pc
rather then learning how a computer works physically.

Nevertheless, this proposition still attracted me. When i went to
my first programming class, it was so alien to me. As the course
went by, I loved programming. It's not something easy to do,
especially the more advance parts. Let me put into perspective
how hard it is to do programming, for some of you this may not
be hard at all. Lets say someone gives you a law book and asks
you to know every angle of the law book. Then lets say every
one of the law in there has a unique shape and limitations. Now,
using all the resources there, they ask you to build a building
for a specific reason using the least amount of resources. That's
the only comparison i can think of right now, i hope you guys
understand that, lol.

IT tho is not all about programming, there is database,
networking, data mining, security, games creation and quite a
few more. It's not something easy to do but i hope i'd be able
to sustain my interest in this field and make a career out of it.

Thanks for reading guys :) till next time peace out

Unconditional Love

Love....such an illusive word. What is love? Is it just
a creation of man or is it the way we're meant to be?
I don't know what love is, but seeing many people's life
and how they have gone about it, I think I have a general
idea on how to be happy in my love life. There is no such
thing as constant happiness, there is no smooth sailing
forever, there is pain and there is gain.

In my case I had a bad first experience with love, things
didn't turnout perfect no manner how much I wanted it to.
This was because me and my ex were not in the same wavelength,
for you to be with someone in a long term relationship,
you must know what they want and they must know what you
want and both must be willing or able to give them the
things they desire. Love is just happiness you get from
mutual convenience at the beginning, without this feeling
there is no attraction and there is no infatuation.

Some people find having someone pretty is convenient for
them because they like to think they are able to get someone
like that, for others they one someone who can help them
with their deepest problems, some want someone their family
see fit and so many more. There is only one thing in common
to all of these, magnitude of the benefit you get out of
the other person, different people place more importance
in different things.

Now, how does infatuation/attraction turn into true love?
True love is basically you love the person so much, you
appreciate all the thing they have done for you and you
want to reciprocate by doing the best things for them. I
actually never believed anyone can be so appreciative of
a person till I met my gf. Although she might not realize
it, she changed the tide of my life, she made be lose my
worst habits and give me some good habits to follow. You
may say anyone could have done this, well not for me. I
am stubborn, i want to do what i want to do, I want to
have fun without worrying what people think of me.

My gf made me realize how self destructive that is. She
was the only one able to put some sense into my head. I
honestly have to say, at first what I saw in her was how
pretty she was and how nice it was to talk to her. The
rest only came later, i wanted to make her very happy for
being with me as I thought she deserves someone with
better looks then me. I told myself I have to make myself
worth her time. Later I realized everyone has their bad
sides and they can really get to you, but by this time I
willing to do anything for her for what she has done for
me.

I think this is what they call unconditional love, just
like the love I have for my mom. She made me who I am and
without her and my dad I won't be here. So, logically as
long as I want to live they have my love, actually even
if I hated my life now, I'd still love them because mom
especially gave everything she had for me. There is no
one who can tell me, it's not worth for my to help my mom
when she's in trouble or when she's in difficulties. No
matter what she does, the love for her will be there.

It's the same love I have for my gf, as what I am now is
what I am after I met her and I’m so happy i chose this
path. So, no matter what my gf does I'll love her, even
if this leads to her leaving me. I won't know what to do
if I had to pick sides between my mom and my gf. There is
also another similarity i see with the two of them, both
of them have no way of replacing me. I am just as important
to them as they are important to me, and that makes me
happy. There are 3 people who i deem fit for my love, my
mom, my gf and myself. These are the three unconditional
loves in my life.

I'd do anything for any of my unconditional loves except
for stop loving them or killing myself. Well that's it for
this time, just have a few final words.

I love you MOM! thank you for everything you've done for me

I love you Kanami, my honey ^_^. For being there for me
despite all my faults.

Alright, see ya'll till next time, peace out ^_^

Football in My Life

Football, the game of the planet no sport has been played more
widely and more frequently then this game on earth. It's also
the one game I'd live and die for if i was given a chance, just
too bad I wasn't born to Ian Rush or Jurgen Klinsmann. It all
started with my dad buying me a ball, there was an open field
right opposite my house where all the kids used to come and play
at 5:30 in the evening and I'll be usually there by 5 with my
ball kicking around waiting for friends.

If one of them see me on the field, they will go round up like
4 or 5 kids from around the area and come join me on the field.
When the 6 of us play more kids will see us and join us, there
were about a total of 10-14 kids in my area who'd be waiting
for the 5:30 kick-off and would be cursing the rain if it showed
it's face. They they hated having to go tuition during that
time on some days. This is where my passion for football bloom,
even my dad, back then about 45yo you'd join us and play.

He'd usually be the goal keeper, but never misses the chance
to take free kicks and penalties. If he was taking it, no kid
would dare be the goal keeper LOL. His kick was like a missle
launcher, seeing my dad play soon older kids started joining
us. Wow it was such a challenge playing with them, but I loved
it, I learned so much from them. As for being a fan of club
sides, it was the golden age of the malaysian league, unlike
the mess they call a league now. I was a supporter of the red
giants, Selangor F.C and I always love to watch Selangor play
Singapore. Yes singapore back then was int he malaysian league.

Players like K.Senbagamaran and Azman Adnan were real idols to
me. As time passed, Singapore left the Malaysian league to set
up their own league, which is a lot better then the malaysian
league now. The interest I had in the Malaysian league slowly
dwindled. Then I moved my attention to the world cup and Euro.
in Euro 1990, I was a big fan of West Germany, with my fav
player of all time so far(Gerrard and Torres will over throw
him soon) leading the German attack, Jurgen Klinsman. Rightly
so, West Germany won the world cup that year beating Argentina
in the final.

This world cup though open my eyes to sooo many talented players
with the likes of Diego Maradona, Roberto Baggio, Paulo Maldini,
Davor Suker, Paul Gascoigne and Marco Van Basten. I watch them
play every single game and tried to copy their moves on my front
yard. Guess what, it really helped ever since then I just kept
getting better and better in football and before I knew it, I
made the school team. The teacher(coach) told me I'm skinny and
I need to put on some weight, I still got a few game experience
under my belt though.

Between that time and the next world cup, I had already become
an important player in my school team and had played football
every evening in the field if it wans't raining. The 1994 world
cup was also an amazing experience and I was still supporting
Germany since Klinsman was still there. I've not seen another
player in the world cup who scores as many goals as him. He
scored in nearly every game germany played, such and awesome
player. By this time though, I was already a Liverpool fan and
I was pretty sad that England did not qualify, I really wanted
to see Robbie Fowler and Steve McManaman playing for England
in the world cup.

This world cup was a lot more of a leanring experience then the
last one because now I knew a lot more things about football
and had a betetr control of the ball then before. This is when
I started perfecting my dribbling skills, I could take on 3 to
4 players at a time when I was playing for my school then. I was
not the hero of the school team, although I provided a lot to
the school main strikers who were twins. They were awesome too,
I had so much confidence in they goal poaching ability that I
wouldn't shoot if I had the chance to pass to them even if I
had a clear shot. I was afraid i'd miss and I was sure they'd
never miss.

I still kept on playing every evening and become better and
better but second year in secondary school I decided to stop
playing for school because I didn't like the coach who kept
complaining that I was too thin although by then I was already
a good player. I was probably the 4/5th best player in my year
in school in the attacking/midfield position. Since then I only
played in inter class tournerments and school sports day. I
had also become a hardcore Liverpool fan and started practicing
complicated skills at home in the evenings.

When I got to university, football was also something I did every
evening. I had a football star status in Uni, it was the peak
of my form, till I injured my ligerment and never fully recovered
back to the same form again. Still not too bad though, before
I could aim a cone on the goal post from the middle of the field
without missing it, that accuracy wasn't there anymore. I still
played for my uni and a club called Bear Hill United in the MMU
league. Those were fun times, now days I'm more into indoor
football(futsal). I am the lynchpin of my futsal team, the mvp.
haha I wish I was born to Jurgen Klinsmann, with the passion I
had and his training, I would have be playing by the side of
Torres and Gerrard hunting for the Champions League and Premier
League titles.

Liverpool is at the a point where it's argueably in the best
form of any team in the world. Trashing the two biggest clubs
in the world Real Madrid and Manchester United. Now, they have
been drawn against Chealsea in the champions league, how I wish
i could terrorize them with torres and gerrard. I don't have the
skill I need for that, so I'm giving all my heart to you guys
to bring back the European champions league to Anfield for the
6th time!!

That's if for this entry, c ya'll. Peace out ^_^

Fantasies with sword and magic

Every since I was a little boy, I was never really a fan of books.
I was always the boy meddling with his building block making
everything from Aeroplanes to Windmills. When I went to my first
year in school, I saw a friend reading a kids story book with
pictures and story(King Author). I didn't read though, I just
flipped through the pages to see the pictures and make out the
story but the more i see the pictures the more I wanted to read it
so one day I borrowed the King Author and the Roundtable Knights
book from the library to read.

I read the first few pages it was really exiting, but something
just deflected my attention from it. This time it were the lone wolf
game books, I saw my friends playing it and writing down their
stats and battles, I was so intrigued. I wanted one of those books
so bad. One day when we passed by the book shop I persuaded my mom
to get me the book, mom thought it was some kinda story book or
something and would be good. I went back home and immediately
tried to make sense of the whole thing reading the instructions
and everything, i didn't get it lol.

The next day I went to school and asked my friend how to play and
he thought me. Since then my whole attention was on the game book
and i'll play the whole day long. It was the most fun I had at
that time. The game book made my interest in Medieval battle with
sword and magic flourish. After i was done with my book I exchanged
it with my friend's book and so on, ended up finishing quite a few books.
Then at one point there were no more game books, but by this
time I understood all these medeival stories and things. I found
my old unreturned King Author book LOL(yeah never returned it >.<)

I took my time to read that book and it was the best book I've
read, the honour, the skills, the magic, the knights and the weapons.
I loved it, so many of the things I created were named Excalibur
hahaha. Everything from a sword drawing to a hand craved ice cream
stick. From then on I never read any stories that didn't involve
magic and adventure and swords. Some of the other books I read were
a local folk lore called "Hang Tuah", Treasure Islands, Sinbad and a few
more(younger days).

Not only did I like the novels, when I got my computer, even games
were only those with sword and magic (except a few like X-Com).
I always wanted to be a knight or an adventurer saving the damsel
in distress hahaha. After years and years of Swords and Magic, I
found the best book ever written, The Lord of the Rings!! This was
what my whole life of reading swords and magic was meant for LOL.
The best book ever, I became a fanatic and soon after the movies
were released. Most fantastic movies ever made, I wished I was
one of the Riders of Rohan, the mounted warriors from the West
Fold.

Then after that it was Harry Potter, although it was not as good
as Lord of The Rings Harry Potter was full of adventure and magic.
I loved these books too and I read all of them. How I wished life
could be all about training with swords and magic, protecting your
kingdom/family/friends from harm, saving a beautiful maiden and
make her fall in love with you and live happily ever after haha.
If only life was as interesting, this is one of the reasons why
MMORPG attracted me, it was an alternate life where you can really
become a Legend, a warrior people respect and enemies fear.

As much as the interest in Swords and Magic improved me and messed
me up. Thanks to my interest in it, I found my maiden, the most
beautiful girl I've ever known and now she is my gf and I'm definitely
going to make her my wife and hopefully live happily ever after
(haha is this even possible in this world?) Doesn't matter, I'd
be her knight when she's in need and i'll weave magic and make her
happy when she's sad. I'll hunt for a better living for us to enjoy
life to the fullest. Honour and Courage has been me all my life and
i'll never change it.

That's it for my episode 2. More to come soon, peace out guys ^_^

PS: Riders of Rohan Music...I love the part from 2:25 - 3:20 have
a listen ^^

Amazing Love Songs and the rest of my favourites

It's time for the first of my 10 episode blog entry folks.
I was actually suppose to do this post like 24hours ago,
but while I was halfway into typing out the entry the
electricity went off and I didn't safe my narration. I got
so pissed after the power went of and lost all my mood to
do this entry then haha. I keep my promises though, so
here my entry on

"Amazing Love Songs and the rest of my favourites"

A couple of months back I was listing all my favourite
songs to my gf. My gf realized something and told me that
it seem like I like a lot of love songs. On that day I
realized how true she was. I don't care what people say
but love songs are awesome, from the oldies to the latest
ones.

When I listen to old love songs I just feel like grabing
my gf and having a slow dance with her. The love in my
heart boil and overflows haha. Here are a few of my
favourite old love songs:

LOVE - Nat King Cole
Put Your Head On My Shoulder - Paul Anka
The Way You Look Tonight - Frank Sinatra
Unchained Melody - Righteous Brothers

Wow, how timeless these songs are...they never fail to
spark the love inside me up. Can't help but to sing along
to it.

Old love songs are not the only once I love though. The
love songs that have been coming out lately are amazing
too and i have no doubt these songs will never leave my
list of favourites for a long long time. Here are some of
those songs:

Boston - Augustana
I'm Yours - Jason Mraz
Love Bug - Jonas Brothers
Everything - Michael Buble
Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's
1,2,3,4 - Plain White T's
A Walk Through Hell - Say Anything
Always Be My Baby - David Cook

Listening to these songs just makes me want to pick up
a guitar and start writing a song to dedicate to my lovely
girlfriend. I've written a few but I don't think it's close
to any of these songs. Still made my gf really happy though
^_^

There was also a time when love songs rules the air and
trends. This was during the age of the boybands, no one
can deny that it's the love songs they wrote that made them
a force to be reconed with. I loved those boy bands, call
me gay or emo all you want. I just felt the some songs they
wrote were amazing. Here are a few of those:

All I Have To Give - Backstreet Boys
Show Me The Meaning Of Being Lonely - Backstreet Boys
I'll Never Break Your Heart - Backstreet Boys
As Long As You Love Me - Backstreet Boys
Back Here - BB Mak
Words - Boyzone
Baby Can I Hold You Tonight - Boyzone
No Matter What - Boyzone
This I Promise You - N'Sync
God Must Have Spent A Little More Time On You - N'Sync
I Drive Myself Crazy - N'Sync
My Love - Westlife
Flying Without Wings - Westlife
World Of Our Own - Westlife
Swear It All Over Again - Westlife

This was truly one of the golden ages of the music industry.
Then there are also other songs which are not in those lists
I listen before but without doubt touches my heart everytime
I listen to them. Here are some of those:

Wouldn't It Be Nice - Beach Boys
Have You Ever Really Loved A Woman - Bryan Adams
I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
You Took My Heart Away - MLTR
I'm Leaving On A Jet Plane - Jewel
You and Me - Lifehouse
Here Without You - 3 Doors Down
Way Back Into Love - Hugh Grant & Haley Bennett

I guess that's quite a bit of songs I have there. Now it's
time for me to give my due respect to all the other songs
that has definately inspired me and pumped me up. The list
of songs which are some of my all time favourites:


Im No Superman - Scrubs Theme Song
Semi Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind
Wonder Wall - Oasis
Through The Glass - Stoned Sour
Follow Me - Uncle Kracker
I'm Just A Kid - Simple Plan
Mungkin Nanti - PETERPAN
Drive - Incubus
All The Small Thing - Blink 182
Hey Jude - Beatles
No Rain - Blind Melon
Viva La Vida - Coldplay
The Sceince of Selling Yourself Short - Less then Jake
Heaven - Los Lonely Boys
Smells Like Team Spirit - Nirvana

Now no one can say I'm just all emo...I like these songs
too haha. Some may still be love songs tho lol..
but hey I can't help it :)

"Live live with love or don't live at all"

Hope you enjoyed this post. Catch you guys with my next post

Peace out ^_^

Top 10 Things in My Life

This past week has been one of the most clueless
week I've had in a long time. My mind drifting
everywhere and yet I don't have anything physical
to do. I've exhausted or overdone or unable to do
all the things I have interest in.

I've been pretty much messing around with Java
programming the entire week till I'm kinda tired
of it for now. So, I decided I'm going to write
a blog entry. Since I think I'm unable to get my
hands on any of my interests, I made up my mind
to write about them instead.

I sat down and thought about the 10 things that's
been the most in my mind the past week (except 1).
In this entry I'm just going to list them out and
for the next 10 entries to come, I'll elaborate
further on my interests.

The Top 10 things I love in life that I'm going
to write about in the coming weeks are:

1. Amazing Love Songs and the rest of my favourites
2. Fantasies with sword and magic
3. Football
4. Unconditinal Love
5. Information Technology
6. The Supernatural
7. Games that require thinking
8. Sense of achievement
9. Anime
10. My Girlfriend

Now when I read back on all the interests that I've
placed there, I really think I have quite a bit to
write about each of it. I can honestly say these are
the things that make me really happy or really curious.
If I hadn't experienced even one of this things, I'd
be a very very different person from who I am now.

So people, I hope you'll come and read about this
things i'm going to write about in the coming weeks.

Till next time :) Peace Out